As you might have heard, the Mexican National Team produced a historic result today in their defeat of Germany, reigning World Cup Champs. The celebration in Mexico was so earthshaking that it actually provoked seismic activity across the Nation. Shortly after Hirving Lozano scored the winning goal for his side in the 35th minute, the Mexican Government reported that small artificial earthquake was reported "possibly due to massive jumping."

The plausibility of the foot stomps being responsible was corroborated by SIMMSA, the "seismic monitoring network" operating out of Mexico City. The precise moment took place after Lozano's goal, a timely feed from Javier "Chicharito" Hernandez, his partner in attack. "Chicharito used to ply his trade in Leverkusen, a club several Germany players passed through at some point their careers including Julian Brandt who wears the no. 20 kit for his country.

Germany had several chances to equalize late in the game, but Mexico, a team built on "social attachment," fought hard to seal their win. The victory puts them in first place of Group F with Sweden and South Korea yet to play match. They square off tomorrow at 8 am at Nizhny Novgorod Stadium, a venue erected specifically for the 2018 World Cup.