So, what else is there to talk about this week besides “Detox”?  Dr. Dre’s fantasy album from the future is actually gonna come out.  I went to this new Microsoft Store last week (total rip-off of the Apple Store, FYI) and it reminded me of “Detox.”  The store is set up where there’s about 20 TVs inside the walls used like wallpaper, with videos and graphics popping up all over the place.  It seriously looked like some shit right out of “Total Recall.”  I thought to myself, “Damn.  This is what I thought the future would be like, and now it’s here.”  But the truth set in at the same time.  It’s just some goddamn TVs in the wall.  I’m standing here looking at them, and the world hasn’t stopped. Whoopdie doo.

When Dre’s street single “Kush” leaked last week, it was a surreal feeling waiting for the record to download.  Am I really gonna be hearing the “Detox” single right now?  Then I pressed play… 

OK!  Tight song.  Definitely something I enjoy.  Something I’d be excited to hear on the radio.  But then, just like my experience at The Microsoft Store, the truth set in.  “Wait a minute, Eddie.  Is this the imaginary wet dream of a hip-hop single I’ve been fantasizing about for ten years that would change the spectrum of rap music forever?”  Hell fucking no.

Welcome to Dr. Dre’s world.  Have you ever thought about why it’s taken him 10 years to drop “Detox”?  It’s because he’s faced with an impossible task.  The album can never be as good as we’re imagining it will be.  For it to be that good, it would literally have to give us a contact high through our iPod earbuds while listening to it.  When “Kush” leaked last week, I was faced with the harsh reality that Dr. Dre just can’t produce something past what can be heard on an audio recording.  Hip-hop, we have a problem…

But let’s get real for a second.  Dre, I have one hundred percent faith that you are gonna give us the album of an era when it finally (am I actually saying finally and believing it?) drops next year.  And to give you some ideas of what you need to do to make sure this album is a fan favorite when it drops, I’ve compiled a list of my top four “Detox” requirements.  Why not five, you might ask?  Because you’re gonna send in the fifth one.  Hit me up at with your best suggestion for Dr. Dre to make “Detox” a classic, and I’ll pick the best one to feature in next Tuesday’s column.  You’ll also win a free copy of “American Gangster” on DVD, because I’m a G like that.  (US residents only – I’m not that big of a G where I can afford international shipping.)  Here we go.

Dr. Dre’s List To Make “Detox” A Classic – From Eddie G &

1.    Make it synonymous with 2011 – One of the reasons why your last album, “2001,” was such a classic is because when it came out, it was the soundtrack for that year, on every front – in your car, on MTV, at the parties, etc.  Unfortunately, Dre, it’s up to you to reinvent the wheel again and place hip-hop in the epicenter of pop culture.  Pulling that off in our internet-obsessed, ADD-stricken world where Lady Gaga and “Glee” are the biggest things in music is easier said than done.  But if anyone can do it, it’s gonna be you.  Good luck.
2.    Bring back our favorites – Obviously, we need Snoop on the record.  But the masterpiece that is “Detox” wouldn’t be complete without all our favorite MCs involved with the first two albums like Kurupt, RBX, Warren G, Eminem, Hittman, Xzibit, and Knoc-turn’al, on this new one.  We also need to hear from some new guys, who can hopefully carry the torch before “10 Years Sober” or whatever the next album is gonna be called drops.  Which brings us to three…
3.    Don’t put rappers who are popular on “Detox” just to get new kids jumping on the bandwagon – “Detox” needs to be organic like the first two albums.  I don’t want a verse from Drake on it just because he’s the most popular rapper out right now.  That would be very un-Dre.  Dre develops new talent.  He doesn’t need anyone to co-sign him on his own shit, especially to sell records.
4.    Develop a new sound for hip-hop – This is a no-brainer!  We threw away the auto-tune for you.  The coast is clear.  We’re begging you Dre.  We’re sick of what’s on the radio.  Change the game like you’ve done so many times in the past and give us a new type of vibe to geek out over for a decade.
5.    That’s your call – send in your suggestions here.

I’ll be back next Tuesday with something else to talk about and to announce the winner of this week’s contest.  As always, hit me on Twitter or e-mail me with suggestions and feedback. Later!