It’s been a long week in the news. A$AP Rocky was formally charged and Donald Trump blasted Sweden on Twitter, Tay-K was sentenced to 55-years in prison and in the midst of all that, Fofty came out to play. The thing is, Fif and Trump actually have far more in common when it comes to social media antics but Fif isn’t in politics, thankfully. He’s kind of like the Robin Hood but instead of stealing for the poor, he clowns his debtors on social media until his pockets are full.

The rapper’s been across the world this week but even his travel schedule hasn’t deterred him from his side-hustle as the entertainment business’ loan shark. And people owe Fif money, even if they don’t know it yet. Take Jackie Long for example. His girlfriend just landed a new show which meant another Monday payday for Fif. Fif’s superpower lies within his social media presence. While he was laughing on his golden bidet on Instagram, people were reaching their boiling point over the rapper’s antics.

But the thing about Fif is that he’s often poking at a smaller guy -- the guy who went to their last resort of asking 50 Cent, of all people, for a loan. He raised the stakes this week, though. When everyone else’s money dries out, it’s time to start looking at the bigger players in the game, the ones whose pockets are deeper than the ocean itself. 

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“Old Lady” Goes Buck

Will there be a time when 50 Cent and Young Buck make amends? Maybe not until Buck buys himself out of his own contract -- an effort that prompted the former (current?) G-Unit member to launch a GoFundMe page to raise $300K for his release. Unfortunately, even before Fofty became the force that he is today, elements of Fif’s alter-ego came out when he was dealing with Buck specifically. Money isn’t a problem for Fif and neither is consistency. If there’s one thing about their feud, it’s that Fif’s kept the same energy for the most part. Even if that means roasting the Cashville rapper for an alleged fling with a transgender woman. A joke that’s gotten old to the rest of us still provides Fif endless amounts of laughter. 

After making allegations that Buck’s had a relationship with a transgender woman for three years, he provided a “rare pic.” A quick gander will show a transgender person taking a piss on a wall, presumably somewhere in New York City. Even when Fif’s out of pocket, he tries to get in yours like a City Girl. 

It’s Been A While, Jackie. 

An acquired taste is needed to enjoy 50 Cent’s humor but not everyone has it, especially if they’ve previously been at the receiving end of Fif’s public humiliation. Needless to say, Jackie Long doesn’t see any humor in Fif’s antics. Although Jackie believed he cleared his debt with Fofty, he forgot that, much like a mortgage, the debt is neverending. Angel Brinks, Jackie’s girlfriend, is a store owner and now the star of a new reality show which means bags have been secured. That also means that Fif wants a cut.  

“I ain’t paying shit I gave you that LIL punk ass money go find something to do and keep me off your damn page I’m tired of social media shit,” read Jackie’s reply. Picture tears streaming down Jackie’s face while he typing it. "Why the fuck I’m on your page bro come on @50cent get the fuck out of here again n***a. Please get the fuck outta here. I don’t need to be on this shit people calling my phone. Where you get the energy for this shit.”

Work smarter, not harder, Jackie. He unleashed the beast that is Fofty with a mere comment. Shortly after, 50 Cent appeared at the front door of Angel Brinks’ store, waiting for Jackie Long to appear.

You Owe My Son, Now. 

50 Cent has his eye on a dollar at all times. He’s a money man that can even see the dollar sign in the pupils of his seed’s eyes. His youngest son, Sire, secured a $700K contract at the age of 2-years-old after modeling for Kidz Safe. Needless to say, 50 Cent knows star potential when he sees that. 

Dr. Pepper might not be at fault for Sire’s love for all 23 flavors but Fif’ll be knocking at their door in no time. By no means has he approached Kris Jenner’s level of “momaging” but you can’t be a Fortune 500 company and expect free promo from a child model. 50 Cent’s given them until Monday.

Calls From HRF, Blessings From The Prince. 

The Human Rights Foundation might have successfully applied pressure on Nicki Minaj but that bag was too big for 50 Cent to refuse. Nicki was scheduled to headline the Jeddah Music Festival in Saudi Arabia but later canceled over human rights concerns which were actually brought to her attention by the Human Rights Foundation. 

The anti-LGBTQ stance taken by the Kingdom doesn’t faze Fif, nor do their laws of gender segregation. In fact, Fif had so much fun in Jeddah, the thought of moving to Saudi Arabia and changing his name crossed his mind.

“My new name is 50 HALALA , so get with the program,” he said after his performance. “I might move out here I like it.”