Welcome to this week’s ‘140 Bars Or Less’ post where we look at the “best-in tweet” in the world of Hip Hop. This week Common gets his ‘hair did’, Slim Thug hooks up with ‘ratchets’, and Mac Miller puts the ‘ass’ in ‘first class’.
Dissecting the funniest, most entertaining, and outrageous tweets from some of the biggest names in rap who are on Twitter. Twitter is intriguing to fans because it offers an un-buffered forum into the minds of some of your favorite artists. The material is often raw and unfiltered, and lucky for us, most of these guys have no filter.
Was going to go to the Thunder game tonight but was denied by the team to be in their arena. Wow. Smh. Go Spurs!— Lil Wayne WEEZY F (@LilTunechi) May 31, 2012
If you haven’t heard this story, basically, Wayne contacted the Oklahoma City Thunder hours before a massive playoff game in the Western Conference Finals and requested a courtside seat, and special security. The Thunder could not accommodate him, and Wayne took it as a personal affront. Who knew OKC’s front office was filled with Pusha-T fans.
I tired of making it rain!!! I want a free lap dance! Lol.. A sample— Meek Mill (@MeekMill) June 4, 2012
As I have mentioned in the past, money is vital to a stripper’s well-being, they virtual view cash as their sustenance, so good look on securing that ‘sample’ lap dance. Why would Meek Mill ‘make it rain’ at a strip club, and throwing bills all over the floor. There’s an old saying “why buy the cow, when you can get the milk for free?”, and this applies to strippers as such “why grind naked on the customer, when you can pick up the cash for free?”
[Even Rihanna makes it rain in the strip club, as previously featured.]
Snoop Dogg (@SnoopDogg) May 31, 2012
What happened to the days of drinking 40s, they seem to have lost their luster as a disgusting, yet effective way to get proper-angry drunk. This nostalgic picture, just shows you how cool Snoop is. For one, he’s got a cane, that resembles a hockey stick, and for a time there he was basically the spokesman for consuming 40oz of malt liquor. Making drinking 40s of St. Ides, and Old English cool, would be like eating White Castle burgers seem couture.
Y'all ain't come on twitter without freshening up First? Nasty ass tweets— Ghostface Killah (@GhostfaceKillah) June 3, 2012
I don’t know if people are getting on Twitter “without freshening up first”, or if Ghostface just has lofty standards. The main is renowned for the clothes and jewelry he wears. The type of guy that would wear a Polo cashmere robe to the store, might have a different view of what’s “nasty” than your average Joe.
S/O to Silk salon y'all took care of me. Beautiful staff too ... The females obviously— COMMON (@common) June 5, 2012
Probably the most effeminate tweet I have seen since starting this column. Common needs to employ some ‘common sense’, he’s a male rapper giving shout outs to a salon. Wherever you get your haircut is none of my business, just like whoever you hook up with isn’t. A man going to a salon is like a man hooking up with a sub-par girl, do whatever you got to do, but don’t broadcast it on Twitter.
This girl told me I can't fuck wit u slim u fucked my friend. My reply: So everybody fucked her it shouldn't stop us— slim thug (@slimthugga) June 1, 2012
Again, a case of a rapper airing out too much information. Don’t know why Slim is telling everyone he’s hooking up with girls that everyone’s had a piece of. You can just hear Slim now trying to convince the friend “Sweetie, look, I know I was with your friend in the past, but that was a different time in my life and I’ve changed. She meant nothing to me, not like the feelings I have for you. Plus, basically like everybody been up in that bitch.”
Soho club in Moscow! Russian securitylook serious in the front door ! But we good they know my face! Let's go Moscow !— Wyclef Jean (@wyclef) June 1, 2012
Only time I’d be worried in a club at Moscow is when the security guards are not looking dead serious. About the only place more frightening to be without good security is Haiti, but I guess Wyclef has that covered.
I think I just found out why ppl say artists "change" when they get the so-called "big-head". And the sudden realization is making me smile— T-Pain (@TPAIN) June 4, 2012
It’s relieving to see that T-Pain has it all figured out, and as the quintessential voice of auto-tune. Dude is basically to voice modulation, what Michael Jordan is to sneakers. Good thing none of it has affected him, and he doesn’t have a “big head”.
Why is every flight attendant in first class always disrespectful as fuck to me...— Mac Miller (@MacMiller) June 3, 2012
It’s common to hear people in coach complain about a flight, or the flight attendants, but it’s rare to hear someone in first class complain about the service. How much of an ass did you have to be to get disrespected in first class. You know Mac, if every time you’re in first class the flight attendants are mistreating you, then you might want to look at the one constant here, you.
TYLER, THE CREATOR
THIS OLD BLACK BITCH IN WALGREENS JUST TOLD ME I NEED TO GET MY SHIT TOGETHER. HAHAHAHAHA OK— Tyler, The Creator (@fucktyler) June 3, 2012
Ah, Tyler, the Creator, a constant contributor to ‘140 Bars or Less’ for his unfiltered caps lock-heavy Twitter rants. The woman in question might be onto something here, especially when you factor in how you referenced her on Twitter. At the end of the tweet Tyler says “OK” so maybe this is an indication that he’s ready to turn a new leaf and stop screaming like a 13 year old with ADHD all the time. Or maybe this was just a misunderstanding, and Tyler was in the drugstore for an incontinence issue, and the woman was just trying to be helpful.