50 Cent - Superhero Name: Teflon
Before the mainstream knew that Curtis Jackson could rhyme, they knew he could take a bullet… or nine. With an imposing frame and a heart that knows no fear, 50 would be the perfect comic book legend known on the streets as Teflon, the bulletproof bully. How did he get his power? One of the bullets got lodged in his mouth from his first shooting (that actually happened). His immune system responded like ours do to a vaccine and created an impenetrable wall of invincibility. In real life, the rapper/entrepreneur has already crushed many rappers' careers. As a superhero, he would take down street kingpins, befuddling them with his ability to take as many rounds as they can shoot at him. And to show that his powers have not been compromised with his newfound abilities, 50 would coordinate his adventures with the release of a new Vitamin Water flavor, “Bulletproof Grapefruit.”
Ten Rappers Reimagined as Superheroes
50 Cent - Superhero Name: Teflon
Snoop Dogg - Superhero Name: Blunt Man
This one pretty much writes itself. As a man who's always down to try new strains of weed, Snoop discovered a magical strain that gives him superpowers. If a riot is happening, Snoop can come in and inundate a sea of people with sudden cottonmouth and Dorito cravings. Snoop would also be able to transform into a doberman like he did in the “Who Am I (What’s My Name)?” video, and could fly in and out protected by a purple cloud. But even superheroes need a day off. When Snoop needs to pass out and recharge his batteries, he can call on the only other man that can handle such potent… responsibilities: Willie Nelson.
Diddy - Superhero Name: Rack Man
The scary thing is that this one could actually happen. He runs marathons, only requires four hours of sleep and has long been known as one of entertainment’s top thrill seekers. Oh, and he’s also worth over half a billion dollars. Who better to take on the role of hip-hop’s Bruce Wayne than the one and only P. Diddy. As the Caped Crusader, the man with a nickname for every business he owns could easily dip in and out of social functions, all while answering the call of the Ciroq sign lit up in the sky. The original Batman has gone unchanged for decades, but with Diddy behind the mask, the Dark Knight will have a whole new style. 'Cause after all, he did invent the remix.
Game - Superhero Name: Hurricane
When he started out in hip-hop, he was known as Hurricane Game. As a superhero, it’s only right that he have the ability to make it rain... Literally. With his Chuck Taylors, fresh khakis and his signature white tee, the Compton spitter could summon the clouds, wind and rain to any spot that gets too hot. As SoCal’s benevolent banger, Game would use his powers to thwart drive-by shootings that take out innocent bystanders. And as a bonus, the “Westside Story” rapper would inspire '90s R&B sensations Tony Toni Tone to reunite and make a revamped version of their classic song “It Never Rains in Southern California” called “It Now Sometimes Rains in Southern California.”
Jay Z - Superhero Name: Forever Young Hov
Despite being one of hip-hop’s elder statesmen, Jay Z’s popularity and his flow are basically “Forever Young,” so why not incorporate that into his legend? Young Hov would supersede Father Time and keep hip-hop pure by taking out all subpar MCs with single verses. Forever Young Hov would show up at Hot 97 Summer Jam each year and take out all wack newcomers without even having to write his verse down. If you think the Illuminati rumors are bad now, superhero Hov would have to fight other rappers and TMZ.
DMX - Superhero Name: Robbin’ Hood
Ever since he was a kid on the streets of Yonkers, Dark Man X has always had a soft spot for the homeless, and is said to give them large sums of money whenever he can. X also noted in his biography that he used to rob before he became a multi-platinum MC. As a superhero, X would be able to control the minds of all the dogs in the metropolitan area and get them to do his bidding. After getting bit by a pit bull when he was young, Earl Simmons discovered his powers and used them to instruct his army of dogs to find greedy Wall Street types and seedy bankers, shut ‘em down and redirect those funds to the city’s poor and homeless.
Nicki Minaj - Superhero Name: Twerkules
With her new video for “Anaconda,” Young Money femcee Nicki Minaj already proved that she could hypnotize you with the booty. As a superhero, the vivacious vixen would fight crime with, you guessed it, her one of a kind ASSets. One twerk and bad guys won’t even be able to see straight, and while they’re standing looking stupid, Minaj would hit them with the booty bump, sending them into the next area code. As far as her style game, the “Superbass” starlet would come equipped with a limitless array of leather outfits that would make Catwoman look like Bea Aurthur.
Master P - Superhero Name: ICE Man
As the founder of No Limit, CEO Master P reinvented the album cover; it’s only fitting that as a superhero, he would be able to change any scene into a No Limit album cover. Of course being the hustler he is, P would make that side money showing up and turning weddings, class reunions and even Bar Mitzvahs into iced out affairs with rubies, diamonds and emeralds. And if bad guys should happen to crash the party, P would be backed by an army of No Limit soldiers (and the tank from the Mean Green album cover) all ready to make em say “Ugghh!”
Twista - Superhero Name: The Speedknot Avenger
In real life, Twista is the only rapper than can give the untrained listener brain freeze simply by trying to keep up with his rapid-fire flow. As a superhero, Twista would clean up the streets of Chicago, stopping his enemies dead in their tracks with a paralysis-inducing flow that would leave their brains scrambled with more glitches than a new iPhone. The Speedknot Avenger wouldn’t kill his enemies, but he would leave them frozen and inhibited for hours while he steals their girl and goes off to make sure other bad guys and wack rappers think before testing the “Adrenaline Rush” MC.
Drake - Superhero Name: The Chameleon
Over the last four years, no rapper has been able to appeal to as many different demographics than Drake. The Young Money MC, who represents Black, White, Jewish, American and Canadian culture, can blend in with any crowd. As a superhero, these powers would rise to the next level. Drake would go back and forth between Canada and the US, blending in seamlessly with any crowd. Whether it’s a black tie affair or a backyard boogie, Drizzy wouldn’t need to get in where he fits in, 'cause he would always fit in. In addition to thwarting evil-doers’ diabolical plans, he would also be untouchable in any and all karaoke situations.
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We imagine what superpowers Nicki Minaj, 50 Cent, Master P, Jay Z and more rappers would have.
To many fans, rappers are like superheroes. So we thought it might be fun to imagine what it would be like if your favorite rappers actually were caped crusaders or masked avengers. Based on songs, events and characteristics, we compiled a list of rappers and tried to figure out exactly what they would do if they were superheroes. We gave some super powers based on physical attributes (Nicki Minaj, 50 Cent) while others had powers that stemmed from their lyrics, album covers and music videos (Master P, Snoop Dogg, Jay Z).
Whether or not you consider the ability to rap a superpower, you should think twice before messing with some of these guys, 'cause even though they’re only human, they have enough money to handle just about anything or anyone that tests their boundaries. Receiving an honorable mention was former "Making The Band" cast member Dylan whose superpowers would be his ability to "Spit hot fire."